Urban Walker

When Bine and Lisa post their blogs, they include pictures of serene, woodland trails, or grand California vistas.  My exercise environment is vastly different.  For the next month or so, until it gets warmer, the mornings I devote to jogging take place downstairs on the treadmill in front of the morning news anchors, and then, if I'm a good girl, a downtown walk during the lunch hour on the city streets of downtown Canton, Ohio.  It's far from a solitary experience.  I share the sidewalk with the office workers from Nationwide Insurance, the staff from the Marriott waiting for the bus, and many of my clients.  I find it strange and oddly disturbing that while I walk because the doctor tells me I spend too much time being sedentary, all my clients walk because they cannot afford to get around any other way.  Even the bus is beyond their reach.  Unless of course, they have managed to score a bus pass from one of the many social agencies scattered about.  I only walk when the weather is nice, or when I'm feeling energetic.  They walk no matter what. 

The historic Palace Theater in downtown Canton.

Some of  them walk for miles and miles.  Many of them are already browned by this year's early sun.  They walk and walk.  Our Drop-In Center is a popular stop.  They are welcome to just sit, have a free cup of coffee, read the paper or one of the many outdated magazines that get donated.  In the cold and rainy weather it becomes a very important place, for the men especially.  The two men's shelters make everyone get up and out by 6:30 in the morning and they cannot come back until 6 at night.  There is always a line of men waithing for us as we come in. 

The front of my office building. 

 Notice the "No Loitering" sign which is universally ignored.

My clients seem very amused coming across me as I stride down the street, my headphones plugged in.  It didn't take long for them to realize that I wouldn't stop and chat:  I'm a woman on a mission.  But they all make sure to let me know later when they have made a "Judith spotting".  I don't know if the irony of the situation hits them the way it hits me, but they are very supportive, never-the-less.

It's a very different experience, this lunch time urban walk.  The scenery is not nearly as relaxing, but it makes for a great break in the day.

 

I have share my little victory this morning:  I got my minute back!  For some reason I lost a minute off my pace last year.  I went from 28.30 to 9.30 a mile. Then I couldn't seem to push beyond 10 min this season.  But doing the intervals and consistent conditioning has brought me back into the 28's.  This morning 'race pace" 5k tune up for this weekend: 28:45.

Old dog, not doggin it!  New tricks!

Getting back on the horse

This week I have a bad experience, not necessarily as bad while I was out for a run, but afterward. My run itself was somewhat challenging, but I pushed through it and finished the 3 miles midweek run. As soon as I stopped walking though and entered the house, I seemed to crash. My body decided it absolutely had enough. I laid down on the floor and that's were I stayed for the next twenty minutes. For the rest of the day and all through the night I was overcome by chills and despite sweater and blankets was not able to get warm. I wondered, if I had down something bad during the run, but it wasn't hot enough outside to be heat exhaustion or anything like that. I still felt off the whole next day and skipped my run that day.

Today, I wanted to do my scheduled run, but I was so scared. I didn't know what to expect. After a few days, I figured that my body had probably been fighting an illness and the run had just brought it to the surface, but since I never really had any other symptoms, I couldn't be sure.

I had a really hard time, deciding what I wanted to do. Originally, I had thought about participating in a training run for my half marathon in three weeks, but I didn't want to drive all the way out there, just to discover that I wasn't ready to run the distance. I also was afraid that my ego would make me run faster - being surrounded by other runners - than I should be running. Homebody suggested I should just go to the park by our house and run several loops to continue with the 11 miles on the schedule. I would know all the trails and could always cut it short, if I needed to.

It took me forever to get out the door this morning. My stomach was turned upside down, because I was so nervous to step back out there. I kept telling myself that it is kind of like having fallen of a horse and that I just needed to get back on. So I just kept getting ready, despite all the doubtful thoughts in my mind until I had closed the door behind me and was on my way to the park.

I knew I would start of with doubts in my mind, wondering if I would be able to manage the whole distance. I told myself to take it really slow and never let myself feel exhausted. Instead of letting a thought of fear "can I really make it this time?" creep in, I kept repeating "just get back on the horse and it will be fine" in my head. And fine it was. I told myself to enjoy the scenery and mentally go for a walk. As I made my rounds through the diversity of the park landscape, I kept reassuring myself that my runs will always be diverse, just like the landscapes.
I am very glad, I got back on the horse (but honestly, still hope, I don't fall off like this again..).

So my first posting on our collective blog is to be one of confessions and frustration.  As everyone knows, two weeks ago I went to the doctor as the first step in my new fitness program.  I had been avoiding for a long time admitting that I had "left myself go".  I've gotten lazy and complacent eating whatever I felt like, occasionally trying to ""get in shape.  My efforts over the past decade have been made in short spurts and then have just fizzled out. The last real push was this past summer when I started running with all of you. 

 Then I took part in the 5K over Thanksgiving and the whole experience just soured me.  Even though I try to tell myself that simply finishing is a victory, coming in last was so very demoralizing.  (Those two strolling, gabbing ladies I passed in the last 500 yds. do not count...I was last.)  All of it just served to remind me of how far I  have fallen.  I used to be fast.  I used to be skinny.  I used to be...young!

However instread of turning all of that into determination, it gets transformed into defeat and depression.  The climb back to fitness seems so daunting!

Despite all that...I'm taking yet one more stab at it.  I do so desperately want to recapture some of my energy and yes, my youth, once more.

But here's the confession:  a mere two weeks in, having lost six pounds (which should be inspiring and confirming) I find myself already feeling angry and defiant.  I want it to be easy.  I don't, don't, don't want to be so HARD.  If there was a magic pill, I would take it in a hot minute.

So the last few days I have exercised half-heartedly and with much grumbling.  Alreaady I am thinking of ways to cheat on the diet.  Yes, I did manage to stay away from the office goodie bowl, but I'm beginning to cut corners:  portions are getting bigger than they should be, a few "questionable" foods are appearing on my plate.  I've started skippping the half-hour walk at lunch.  (I need this half hour in order to complete the "hour, every day" that my doctor has said I need to put in to lose the weight I need to losel.)

This has all happened so soon!  My resolve is crumbling.  I am beginning to rationalize not giving it my best effort.  I want to cry, I am so disappointed in myself.

I know I am hard on myself.  I have this unrealistic need to be perfect, and this dear family, has always been my downfall.   If I can't be perfect at it, I don't want to do it.  So damn silly.

I want to be able at some point to join in those rhapsodic conversations that you all have when you talk about your running:  the scenery, the calm and release that seems to come over you, the sense of accomplishment.  But I am not there yet.  Not by a long shot.  I am bitchy and mad that I have to do it at all. 

I plan to stay the course, but in order to do so I think doing this is vital for me.  I need to complain and acknowledge just how hard it is for me.  Only by being honest can I move past it.

Over the hills and through the woods...

I guess sometimes it is helpful to pretend that I forgot how difficult or easy are certain route was, in order to get me to go out and do the same route again. Today was such a case. My training schedule told me that I had to go 10 miles. In order to not take up the whole morning, I decided to cut the driving time and go to our nearest State Park. None of the trails are 10 miles long, so I had to combine different trails together.

I decided to play a mental game to help me through the run. So I went the shorter route first and took the seven mile loop second. What I love most about trail running is that I feel way more relaxed about my running and don't panic, if I allow myself to stop in between. Today, I took a whole bathroom break after the first loop - that returned me back to the parking lot - stretched and then headed back out for the longer one. I think that was actually the smartest thing to do, because after 2-3 miles my legs love the stretching and fair much better with the rest of the run.

The part that I had "forgotten" was that the seven mile loop was grated "advanced", which meant lots and lots - and I mean almost all - hills. There is a reason it is called the Kettle Moraine area. I definitely feel I am increasing my fitness level, as I constantly have to use different muscles.

When I started out and up until the middle of the run, I wasn't so sure that I felt like this was a good run, but by the end I had changed my mind.

On the way, I encountered a man who seemed to have something like summer skies on. He had poles in his hands and was running with them. I was kind of amused and wondered, if there is all kinds of equipment out there for each kind of sport to be extended into all seasons. This seemed like an extension of cross-country skiing into the summer. I bet he used those a lot this winter. I have to say though, I was very impressed by the speed he managed to run in those things with.
Speaking of speed, I had the humble experience of being passed by a group of young runners at the top of a double hill. I stopped to let them pass, so I didn't feel like I was followed.
Okay, I confess it was the perfect excuse to stop at the top of the hills.

The run started out cloudy and still a little chilly, but then the sun came out and it welt pleasantly warm. I felt like that sentiment reflected my run today. I started of with a cloudy mind and ended with a smile on my face...

I am, for the most part, a self trained runner.  I  set out to run as a survival tactic after receiving the bad news of being Obese and a candidate for diabetes and coronary heart disease when I was in my mid twenties.  That's 38 years ago.  My running has been solitary and defensive, that is cautionary.  Not too much too fast too far.  In spite of my efforts and no doubt due to my inconsistency over the years, I did become diabetic and had coronary heart disease for a time.  As I've noted to Bine, I think, getting past the age that my grandfather died (62) was a real threshold for me.  At the same time, due to an injury to my right knee I had to  lay off running for 18 months.  By fasting I not only maintained weight but acutally lost weight.  Since then my running has been more for pleasure.

Now I'm wondering how to really ensure that I can keep running as a senior.  I am in my 60's for God's sake!  I bought Galloway's Book on Running to learn more about the walk run walk approach and am going to give that a go.  I am also to adapt his training approach to my routine.  As a diabetic, I am advised to do resistance training as well as cardio.   The resistance training is supposed to general with the goal of over all fitness and lean muscles.  Skinny is the thing!  So I run three days a week, lift three as my foundation.  but...I can still use the Galloway approach to increase speed and endurance.  The Walk/run/Walk is essentially intervals, so I will be adding that to one day's run every two weeks.  On opposite weeks I will work up to a really long run.  Hence today:  a conversation pace 4.5 mile run over 48 minutes.  Could have gone longer.  Very comfortable effort.  My regualar mil time decreased from 10 minutes miles to 9.30 last week.  That was my speed last summer.  I would love to get this down to 9, 9.15 which would make me competitive in local races in my age class.


Took Judith out for Easter dinner tonight.  she had seafood, appropraite to her new diet. I had sushi rolls.

Next week I will be playing construction worker in Birmingham Alabama, to help with tornado recovery there.  I hope I find the opportunity to run there. 

It's like pizza

This weekend my long run was a recovery run of only 6 miles, before picking up miles again over the next weeks to get up to half marathon distance by the beginning of May. Still, I decided I wanted my weekend getaway with a run down the Ice Age Trail. This trail has become my all time favorite. I love the small single track hiking trail that doesn't allow for much more space than me and my thoughts.

Since the run would be shorter, I dared myself to take the uphill course rather than going the other way around.

Well, what can I say some days you feel like you are gliding while you are running and some days you feel like an elephant stomping through the vegetation making awfully loud breathing noises. I was the former today. It seemed like I just couldn't get the right breathing pattern going and relax enough as to not feel like my feet were pounding the ground. There were several walking stretches in this run and I had the option of cutting the run short.
I took the middle turn between the long run and the short run, not knowing what mileage this would actually put me at, when I reached the car. As I was approaching the car, ambition overcame me and I didn't want to sell myself short on my already shorter run. So I turned my thoughts off in order to not have them interfere with the decision I just made and turned down another trail to add the still missing mile and a half.

As I was nearing the end of the run, I of course started to feel much better and my form was improving. I passed a man close to the end of the trail, who looked at me and said "looks like you are nicely trotting along here". It's good he didn't see me any earlier...

But in the end, running is like eating pizza to me...even if it is a bad one, it is still pretty awesome!



And when I went to the running store on my way home to buy more energy chews and talked to the sales clerk, we got to talking about training goals. I told her that I love running on the Ice Age Trail and she said "oh, so you are more into the technical running". That comment made my day, because it made me feel like a bad ass :-) Day and run saved for sure!

A new appreciation

I have to running stories from this weekend.

On Saturday morning my alarm went off half an hour earlier than it would during the work day to volunteer at "The Trailbreaker", where my friends would be running a half marathon. I have never actually been on the other side and volunteered at a race instead of participated. If you've never done it, I can only recommend it. It gave me a whole new appreciation for the work the volunteers are doing (not that I didn't already appreciate them before).
The biggest lesson I learned: If you are running a race and you know somebody who volunteers at the registration desk (especially if there is no pre-race packet pick-up and everybody has to pick up their stuff on race morning), don't be mad if they don't even remember your name. It's not personal; at that moment they probably didn't even remember their own name. Uum, yes I am talking about myself...It was actually my half marathon's coach's name from last year, that I couldn't remember in the craziness of the moment. She pretended to not be offended. I wish the craziness would come with a little bit of amnesia, so I wouldn't even remember my embarrassment.

After registration, I went outside and stood by the finish line, first watching the 5Kers finish their race and then slowly watching the half and full marathoners make it across. It wasn't one of the beautiful days we have had in the last weeks, and I wasn't prepared to freeze that much. But I was determined to take pictures as my friends crossed the finish line. With blowing on my fingers to keep them warm and jumping up and down, I not only made everyone wonder, why I didn't just go inside, but also managed to hold out until I could take the pictures I had waited for. And I got them in the picture. Yeah. Well, I concentrated so hard that I forgot to cheer as they crossed, but I guess you can't have it all. Cheers now! You two rock!


Sunday morning (today), I decided to test out the route I will be running for my half marathon in six weeks. After getting lost on my way there, I was glad, when I finally made it and could set foot onto the trail. It was a beautiful run and besides a man with some huge radio headphones, who wished me a nice run, and a couple of other runners at the beginning of the trail, I had the whole route all to myself. Didn't see a single soul and didn't mind.


It was an educational run for me as I learned a few things on the way:

• My half marathon this time will be nothing like the last one. I think I will be much prouder this time, as I will have conquered many ups and downs (hopefully just trail wise)
• Sandy spots are much harder to run on
• I am crazy, because I liked the hills much better than the flat 2 miles at the end. I guess, when there is varying terrain with rolling hills, you never know what awaits you around the next corner. It's like a child on an exploration, while on flat terrain you just wait for it to be over (this is a personal view and I don't expect anybody else to agree with me)
• I like running 9 miles more than running 2 or 3 (again, don't expect you to agree).
• I will trust my own instinct instead of a map or a gadget to tell me how to get to the trail head.
• I will trust my own instinct instead of a map or a gadget to tell me how to get back home from the trail head (yes, I didn't learn on the way there, so I had to not trust myself again) --sometimes it takes two wrongs to learn a lesson
• Next time I spend less time driving to a trail and more time running on it
• Nature is still worth it, see below.